Freedom, responsibility and our choices.
I believe that taking responsibility for ourselves as adult human beings is possibly one of the most annoying, exhausting, courageous and great things we can do for humanity.
The original quote, “…there is no freedom without responsibility” is attributed to many, many people if you give it a quick google so I'm not going to claim I heard it from anyone in particular, nevertheless it was a bit of an ‘aha!’ moment for me when I came across it just a few months ago.
At the time, and this is a continuing struggle for me, I was tired and disillusioned with all the things I needed to do. It seemed the list was never ending, constantly growing, and I didn’t want to do any of it.
I didn’t want to sort out my tax, or plan the next workshop, or do outreach, or fix my website. I didn't want to exercise or cook breakfast or water the garden, or book my car in for a service. I wanted to just be. I just wanted to stop and not have to do anything. I wanted to put it all down and never come back, I wanted to walk into the wild and eat berries and sit in a cave for 70 years.
I thought about it, I really did, but then I thought about how I would still have to collect the berries, find wood for a fire, and learn how to protect myself from both the elements and predators. If I were to escape from this current state of existence and go live in another I would still carry it all with me… My responsibilities exist wherever I am because I exist, and most importantly because I exist with freedom.
I am free to think, do, speak and act in pretty much any way I want. There are consequences always and forever, but the important thing here is that I have the initial freedom to choose all of them. With that freedom is the immense responsibility and awareness that with each choice I make, I lay a new brick in the building I call home. The type of home I’m building relies entirely on the choices I’m making.
If I want to have the freedom to run my own (successful) business I must accept the responsibility that comes with that and make a plan to keep on top of my to-do list.
If I want to have the freedom to paint in my studio and create works of art, then I must also accept that I have a responsibility to get in my damn studio and paint.
Want to publish a book, best get to writing it.
Want to do the splits, best start stretching.
Want to increase mental health and find a more stable level of happiness?
You had best believe that one is my responsibility (and yours) as well…
I’m a member of a few different Eating Disorder and Chronic Pain support groups, but I’m in and out randomly because I find it really hard to deal with the lack of responsibility that people seem to take for themselves. I’m empathetic but only so far as I know how shitty a shit place can feel. Once you’re aware you’re in such a place however, your responsibility starts.
You can not and will not remain in recovery from your ED until you start taking 100% responsibility for it.
Likewise, you will not recover from chronic pain until you forgive the original injury and start taking responsibility for where you find yourself today.
There is no freedom without responsibility. Damn it! But also, yay! I’m the boss, I get to decide, I get to do, to make, to break, to discover and create. Since reading that quote a few months ago I have been able to step up to my own plate with a lot more presence and faith in what I have to offer, because I’ve made the choice to take on that responsibility. It is not the duty of my followers, family or friends to make me feel worthy and believe in myself.
That is my job and my job alone.
My freedom, my responsibility.
ALi
